Alan Dignam

Good-day to you again,

I see this weblog has seen a wide take up, I imagine therefore that my fellow residents feel that it is a fruitful pursuit. I will keep my personal feelings out of it but I might just say that this diary entry style of recording has lead to some rather candid and heated writing by some, and I hope we do not put in jeopardy our decorum, it seems to me that one can maintain an interesting and healthy series of entries without becoming base in tone, or inflamatory.
But thats not the purpose of this entry, I have been thinking to myself since my last post and reading the thoughts of others that I might share some of the insights I have gained throughout my life, and the experiences that have formed me, and who knows it may be a good example to some of our younger 'interneters'.
When I look at the state of our Nation and the wider world today it seems to me that very quickly people have lost their sense of respect. And respect believe you me is a very important thing, perhaps the most important of things. I dont know what caused it, although the cavalier rebelliousness of 70s New York movies was my first encounter with it, idolising the rebel, the 'loose cannon' as someone to be noticed and regarded. If Im right in this it fed into an anarchic hunger in the youth for notoriety amongst ones peers, no bad thing in a young lad in small doses, but soon the excesses of pop stars and thugs flooded into our homes from the 'tube. Overnight it seems a whole generation changed, young men and women that should have an appetitte for disipline and good taste now taking pleasure in their personal disregard, embracing apathy.
I dont understand how one could find their purpose in a world like that, if apathy is embraced as something to be aspired to then how does one succeed? What is at the end of that road?
The whole mindset is frightening to me, and Im afraid to say I feel like my generation are the last with a real sense of value. Who knows where this daft world is heading when we hand over the reigns eventually..and we will have to.

Never mind the bollocks??
Actually, I think I will young man.

Good night and good luck residents,
Alan Dignam.

Nigella Roth

Whats this? Oh I see.
Evening there, Im Nigella Roth, legatee of the Crowne family, you may have heard about our reputed stallion collection in Westchester. Of course that doesnt much factor for me anymore, not since I was a young foolish girl that went against daddy's wishes and ran off with a young Jewish pork butcher. I threw my chance at a happy and glamourous life out the window that night. God if I could turn back the clock..
I see my 'husband' has already left a message here, and I figured he spent his time on this damn contraption oogling the girls from the cabaret.
So what am I doing here, what do I get out of this? Oh I dont know, the chance to air my views and wishes, leave some sort of a mark. The more I think about it the more I realise its been too many dark years since I last did that.
We never had a son, Hyman and I, and sometimes I regret that. This house is a big empty place for two old croaks like us. But I wouldnt want to bring a child into a loveless home. Thats right loveless, are you reading this YOU SON OF A BITCH?? You cant silence me here, now everyone can know what its like.
My husband only cares about the pork trade these days, he stays up nights cursing the bastards at the Delhi Deli. Youre a gaddamn jew Hyman, you dont even know what pork fucking tastes like.. Good on 'em I say, drive my husband outta town and do us all a favour.
All I've got is my study, my little corner in the world where I can look at the walls and walls of books and feel the warmth of a fire and imagine that for a few short moments that things might have been different. And let me tell you when I open my eyes and see the withered woman in the mirror I almost wish I was dead. 'Never mind dear, have another long island', I hear myself say.

Botox again tomorrow, as usual. Sad but true.

Seventh Post- Plex Rominus

I'm Plex. Like, obviously that's not what my stoopid parents called me, cuz they're not like, creative or deep or into expressing the emotions or anything like that. I found the name in a book on wicca that my level 8 Warlock BFF lended me for the week. He's like, totally emo like me. But lately he's been looking at that skanky dry-bag Stacy Dignam (And yes, OFC I know she's gonna see this. I already read her dumb little entry on this so called 'Social Experiment'. Guh! The only true method of experimentation involves divining the future from crystals and looking at the moon progression. What an R-tard!)
Anyway, forget her, cuz my other BFF Joney's gonna help me put a hex on her that's gonna make her alone and unhappy for all eternity. What a wench!

I gotta go dye my hair pink for the seance.

Sixth Post - Derek Peeves

Hello All! My name is Derek Peeves. I am a resident of good old Nappy Cove, and I gotta tell ya, I'm super interested in the social experiment that is the Nappy Cove Blog. You see, I run a small but profitable local newspaper, "The Nappy Inquirer", a "NAPPY COVE JOURNALIST AWARD WINNNING PAPER". I see this blog as a chance to flex my mighty writing muscles (and who knows, maybe increase my circulation in the process).

I suppose I'd better tell you about myself; I'm 28 years old, I love to read, to write, the usual. I moved to Nappy Cove five years ago, started distributing helpful information to tourists on A4 sheets (where to get the best pork, for example), and then BANG, I'm the owner and operator of Nappy Cove's biggest local newspaper, employing anywhere up to three separate people (myself included). 

The Nappy Inquirer is famous for its daring exposé's (usually hot-gossip style info that leaves the local housewives panting for more). However, I've been investigating something over the past few months that will...... well, lets just say that its a story with potential. If possible, I'll let y'all know how its coming along.

That's it for now folks! Enjoy this wondrous Blog!

Fifth Post- Fr. Jack Stapleton

Hello there, my fellow seekers of the Light! My name is Father Stapleton and I'm the local Minister in these parts. I was down at Mr. Roth's today, trying to convince the Lowensteins to have a nibble of my pork n' taters, when I heard him talking about this new social experiment. My curiosity tweaked, I ran back to the parochial house to investigate. Now I know what you're all thinking! You're thinking, 'He's a priest, he doesn't have a computer.' But it just so happens that the Bishop has gifted me with a brand new laptop and a 3MB broadband connection. Also, before joining the priesthood, I was a free-lance photographer roaming around South-East Asia, so I'm quite well up on all this modern lark.
I must say, I'm rather impressed that so many of our locals have added to this blog already. Although I can't understand why the Department of Technology and Empowerment decided to conduct their experiment on our rustic little settlement? It should be quite interesting to hear what our inhabitant have to say though.

Anyway, that's all from me for now.
Peace out, Jesus In.

Fr. J.S

Fourth Post- Mrs. Squits

Greetings! Allow me to introduce myself: My name is Miriam Squits (née Rotunde), the local horticulturalist and Chairperson of the Tidy Towns Commintee. I've lived here in Nappy Cove my entire life. I inherited my mothers small cottage on the outskirts of the Glendywell Hills and I live there now with my husband Bill. Some of those big-city folk can't see the appeal of our sleepy Welsh town. I don't know though? As Steve Martin once said, 'Some of these sleepy towns can really pay off...'
Anyway that's just a quick introduction to me. I've got to go now. We're having a Committee meeting to decide on whether we want petunias or violets for the foyer of the school jamboree.

Toodles!!

Third Post - Mr. Roth

Hi there,

Im Hyman Roth, town pork butcher. My family have run the pork circuit in Nappy Cove and nearby Ganleydale for over 60 yeers, but lets just say some unsavourables (foreign) are trying to undercut me with cheap convienience food, and thats my problem thats my gripe.

Im a ham man, and a jew, and some people say that dont go but whatta they know, I got a slice of every porkbelly comin in and outta the Southwest.

I live here with my wife Nigella, if you could even say she still lives here. I tell her and tell her all day, 'Will ya put down that long island and come out from that study? What are you a nightbat?!' But she never does.

I will finish my post now.

Second Post - Stacey Dignam

Hey,

Oh my god I cant believe my dad posted before me!! Mortified! So Im just back from the town meeting where we all decided to do this blog, that guy from the Mainland was pretty weird! I dunno seems kinda lame, like twitter for people with no lives! lol! Nappy Cove is soo lame, people think its an island but its just peninsula that floods! Its so weird to see dad hunched over the new computer, it takes him so long to figure things out! This'll never work! LOL!

Soo about me, Im 17, LOVE dancing, I dance with the school dance team, everyone says Im abit mad, just ask my friends, love you guys! Rofl! And maybe I like a few guys..but NO WAY am I gonna who here!

Amm...Yup thats pretty much me!

Talk soon guys! Lol!

Stace xx

First entry - Alan Dignam

Good afternoon reader,

My name is Alan Dignam and I am a resident of Nappy Cove, I have recently been connected to the internet by the Welsh Department of Technology and Empowerment and have agreed to participate in this social experiment. I am informed that a blog is a series of entries in digital form intended for the public display, a sort of open diary. As such I will, as regularly as is expected, endeavor to maintain a healthy and respectable record on this our town blog. A Blog, I am informed is the abbreviation of Web-log for an increasingly instant and self indulgent youth.

Some background on myself. I went to school in Bishop Auckland, County Durham, before winning a scholarship to Durham University. I have two children, Stacey and Neville (a taxi driver), by my wife, Palmsom. I was involved with the Welsh-Spanish war in the early 1970s, whicvh had a formative impact on me. Eventually, I abandoned pacifism and enlisted in the British, and later German Army to achieve miliary notoriety, serving in C Company of the 8th Battalion of the Royal Fusiliers (City of London Regiment), in which I held the rank of Second Lieutenant and Special Operations Division (Regensburg).

In my recent years I have been a strong supporter of the British National Party and am considering running in local elections.

This is all I will post for the moment, but I will leave you with words that have sustained me through many cold years in a prision run by Franko's son and heir, Inquisator Feliz.
Schützen, helfen, vermitteln, kämpfen

Good evening.

Second Lieutenant Alan Dignam,
Purple Cross; Honourable Discharge.

Welcome to Nappy Cove

Hi there Readers, Welcome to the Nappy Cove town blog. The blog entries here are the entries of towns people in a world first town blog experiment. It is being conducted by the inhabitants of Nappy Cove and was a joint venture between the NappyCove Youth Council and the Welsh Department of Technology and Empowerment.

The stories are real, the drama is epic, welcome to Reality Blogging!






NOTICE: The Department of Technology and Empowerment accepts no liability for the views expressed in this blog, they are the respective thoughts and opinions of the people presenting them.